Wednesday, April 1, 2009

An Introspective: As the Quarter-Life Crisis Continues

On Monday, I turned twenty-six...along way from the days when I dreamt of what it would be like at fifteen or sixteen. Those days are a decade past -- long gone...away. I stopped imagining my future shortly after reaching those teen years. And, maybe that's my problem. There's no real expectation, no anticipation of what life should be like for me as I grow older. Maybe I should start dreaming again.

I have a list of things I'd like to explore and conquer, but I just can't seem to find the spark to get going. I've had a few false starts. A flicker of a flame, an ember that I thought would eventually be just the thing I needed to get me going -- to light the fire. But nothing has seemed to catch on -- yet. I'll continue to forge my path to freedom of creative expression. I'll continue to delve deeper -- and even deeper. My life, my livelihood depends on it. At one point I felt as if I were at a crossroad -- safe career or the danger and uncertainty of what I really want -- to be a living creative expression. Early on I decided I needed to balance -- make money but still explore. Well, that definitely didn't work out the way I had planned. As I look back four years later, my dreams have been all but abandoned -- no nuturing. And what do I have to show for it -- no sense of self or rewarding accomplishment.

Now, someone on the outside looking in on my situation may see it differently. You have a career. You make good money. You have your own place. Yes, all of these things are true. But what I don't have is self-fulfillment. I am working towards it and this (writing this blog) is a huge step. If you have issues you must acknowledge them and attack them head on.

I ask for your help. If you can relate to this post, let me know. If you see me hold me to task and give encouragement. Send an email, post a message. I need all the support I can get in this next phase of my life! Hope you all are up for the journey!

1 comment:

  1. wow. i'm not alone. i can certainly relate. life is challenging. yet, we must hold true to what we love. what we are invigorated by. drawn to and passionate about. that which speaks to us. dare to chance it...all- for it. for that is the ultimate sacrifice...for love...



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